Fear and letting go…

Posted: February 10, 2012 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

The book I have been reading has been inspirational. It’s funny when you find a book that actually makes a lot of sense. And not in an airy fairy way either. It makes VERY good sense. Always helps when they use REAL world examples.

One recent chapter I read was about fear. It discussed one ladies journey into become the “Queen” of self-help writers.

She talked about her own fears and how ‘pushing’ through them she was able to have a very successful life and help many others around the world.

Fear has been a motivator for me.

Back in 2000 I came up with my own quote (I never googled it back then so it could’ve already been taken). It’s simple; “The motivation to succeed, is the fear of failure”. I guess the has been my mantra since then. I don’t want to leave this world singing my “shoulda-coulda-wouldas”. I want to leave this world saying “Did it-Done it-Won it”. It is this fear that keeps me going. For many other people it’s their own fears that stop them. It’s a very large roadblock for them.

I have blogged here before about obstacles; emotional and physical. With out a strong support system e.g; friends and whanau these obstacles can be difficult to get around. Being a success and a strong male role model for my daughters and others has been a part of my own motivation. This is all a part of the journey too. Identifying my fears, harnessing them and conquering them.

I fear death. Like most people as we get older we start to understand our own mortality and the mortality of the ones we love. heading overseas this has been one of my biggest fears. Not my own death, but the death of my daughters, whanau or friends.

I fear for my daughters not growing up to have happy and wonderful lives. I want them to be able to say to their friends now and in the future that their dad was the most positive, truthful and loving dad in the world. That the sacrifices he made when we were younger have helped make us “good” people.

I am scared of anything that has more legs or eyes than me.

I am scared of heights.

I am scared of closed spaces.

AND I think that would be about it.

I think the first two I am most fearful of as I have very limited control over how these things pan out. Unless I lock my daughters away for the rest of their lives and I become good friends with the Grim Reaper. I guess that’s what fear is really. Not having control over something else. Not being able to predict what’s going to happen. Fearful of the unknown. You know now why some people are constantly looking for ‘the meaning of life’. They get sick of their own mundane lives and just wonder ‘what it all means’.

You have to let go. You have to realize you can’t control everything all the time. You have to embrace your fear and push through. Only through great adversity can great change occur. Thats what I am hoping my own journey will accomplish. I’m letting go now.

  1. philosophygonewrong says:

    This may sound odd, but I actually think I have a fear of letting go. I say this because I when I lose something, whether it be a person or item, and I go to let it go, I get this fear that if I don’t hold on to it, that I’m a bad person. So I hold on to this pain.

    I also think that this has a reverse effect as well – that I will avoid making commitments at time, knowing I won’t want to have to face this fear later on, if I can somehow lose it.

    I guess this is one of those life lessons they are always talking about..

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